Astraphobia & “Almost Tandoori” Princess

The story unfolds under a dark and dreadful sky. The moon had disappeared among electrically charged clouds and Thor (God of thunder and lightning) was lashing Chennai because Loki again hid his Tandoori Chicken.

Nature is a dark horse, a total chupi rustum. She will act all innocent and lovely but stored in her kitty are the weapons of mass destruction. One of them is a blinding beauty called Lightning - who can heat up the air to 20,000 degree Celsius – about three times the temperature of the surface of the sun.

Now our little princess, descendant of the mighty Elephant warrior clan of a far away land, is the bravest of her kind. But, every super hero has a weakness. In her case the blinding beauty acts like a Kryptonite, making her sweat and shiver – a very rare phenomenon mind you - all at the same time. And this particular condition has got a too - Astraphobia

So that pleasant evening Princess was busy relishing the delicious Grilled Chicken Sandwich at Parfait3. Jealously watching from above, Thor out of extreme frustration strictly instructed Nature to let the blinding beauty make a Masala Tandoori Princess.

As the sun fell down the horizon, the lazy scene of Babynagar switched into a fast forward mode, breeze turned into wind and the trees were on the verge of being uprooted. Yeah Lightning loves to make dramatic entry.

Blackout. {that’s how the electricity department usually responds}

And then it happened. A white streak of electric charge illuminated the whole Babynagar area for a split second.

This is not good. This is so not good!!!

Goosebumps appeared on the little princess’s delicate hands.

She paid her bill and waited, for the danger to pass. But it refused to subside and kept on growling, mesmerizing the population with her power. She’s stylish you see, this Lightning diva.

Spitting challenge and evoking her to come out of the hideout, she once again roared in deadly glory. With the apartment being just 10 min away, the brave hearted Princess made a life threatening decision – if not now then never and so, among thunder and lightning, shielded only by an old broken umbrella, with a deep breath and heart hammering against her chest, she made a dash for her life.

Chapak chapak chapak...Flash Boom …

Lightning was in a devious mood. Thunder barked down as it spotted it’s victim …

Oh hell!! Please don’t hit me today, I am just twenty something … her mind raced, scrutinizing every cell of her memory that stored any information on lightning.

“Don’t stand under a tree”
No tree no tree no tree

she kept mumbling…

Oh shoot… what about the electric pole… avoid avoid avoid …
Was there something about umbrella too…. Does lightning strike umbrellas?

She tried hard to remember all the sections of Know How?

Yo there umbrella… don’t you dare fail me today….Flash Boom …

She was pretty sure that Lightning would make a Tandoori out of her.

As she increased her pace which would even put Shatapdi to shame, she slipped. Sandal trouble strikes again.

Ohh so this is the time you choose for your tantrums.

Chapak chapak .. slippp … flash … boommm … and it continued …

Her plan was to take a detour, but as she turned round the corner an utter darkness met her, the road was almost invisible.

Never was the choice between “path of light” and “path of dark” so difficult.

Is the nightmare ever going to end !!!

She could feel Thor guffawing at her pitiable condition, rubbing his hands in utter delight.

It was after she jumped few potholes the Princess realized she was sweating.

Salt water is a conductor of electricity !!! 3 Idiots had a whole scene with Hence Prooved written on it!!!

Does lightning strike sweating people?

A vicious smile spread on the blinding beauty Lightning’s lips

On that chilly night, as the vehicles rushed past her, in darkness, the princess - drenched in sweat and rain, under a trembling umbrella and wearing a defective sandal - was determined to reach her room. The determination stemmed from the fact that an incomplete Origami angry bird was lying in her bed.

She almost ran through the AKS Garden gate and found the area submerged in mini flood.

Cursing the civil engineer who designed the colony, she waded through accumulated water when another question struck her.

Does lightning strike accumulated rain water?
I really need to do some wiki reading.
Can’t afford to be another ignorant lightning fatality.
Bhaag bhaag princess princes bhaag bhaag princess bhaag

And as the lightning flashed again, she open the door of her room. Very much alive, drenched in sweat.

After a live entertainment, Thor too stopped lashing Chennai.

** Ironically, Princess is a Thursday born – the day dedicated to God of Thunder and Lightning**

Still alive and Kicking,


An Article by Rajlakshmi who blogs at Destiny's Child

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